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Don’t worry about a thing! – Debbie’s Story

Well it’s been three and a half years since my op and I feel brilliant! However I remember every worry and concern pre op as if it were yesterday. I was 43 when I was diagnosed with fibroids, usual symptoms, heavy periods lasting ages, aches and pains etc. I had 2 children with no intention of having more but the second I was told I needed a hysterectomy I suddenly needed more children! I had a great sex life and thought it would all end….

I basically felt like someone was taking my womanhood away from me but it had to be done. I did a lot of research on how post hysterectomy affects your sex life hence finding this site which was extremely helpful but in the main as always, I guess it’s human nature we love to share our horrors. (remember everyone’s childbirth horror stories?) so although there were good posts it was mostly not.

I had injections to shrink the fibroids for 3 months beforehand which induced menopause… Oh yes you will most definitely know a hot flush from being hot! Even then I started to feel better without the periods, maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all, I don’t think you realise at the time how drained you become from constantly heavy bleeding.

Op day came and I was terrified, would I ever feel like a woman again, if not how would my partner and I survive. THEY WERE REMOVING THE MOST AMAZING PART OF MY BEING A WOMAN. I was devastated!

The doctor was to try key hole and just remove the fibroids, at my insistence, anything to leave everything intact.  It wasn’t possible so I woke up with the usual scar plus the keyhole scars which were more painful, I have to say the big scar was not at all sore mainly because it fell into what I called the numb zone, caused by cutting through nerves I guess, this was above my public bone not below and stayed numb for a couple of years. They removed everything but left my ovaries so I will go through menopause, at least I know what to expect hahaha.

I however felt great and was out of hospital in 3 days, I insisted, the food was not great, not allowed flowers, even in a single side room, the consultant was incredulous at this and told the nurse to leave them, he was just brilliant as were the rest of the nursing team.

My recovery was good but slow,I did get an infection in my scar, but antibiotics cleared it and I used bio oil to minimise the scar and it stopped the itching, you can’t even see it now. I had 12 weeks off work as it’s a lot of lifting. It was a beautiful sunny spring so going for walks was not a problem and I discovered I really enjoy it.

Now to the nitty gritty, how do I feel three and a half years later? Just brilliant, I have to say my sex life has never been better, I’m not with the same man but not due to the hysterectomy, but feeling so well gave me a huge confidence boost and I realised we were not meant to be. I had not at all realised how constantly down and poorly I had felt for probably many years.

Now I am with a new guy, we enjoy so many great things together,we have a dog as we both love long walks but needed the reason to go on them as we have extremely busy work lives. I love my whole life and not having a period it totally brilliant as is not having to worry about contraception at a time in my life when I would still have had to otherwise.

Please ladies don’t worry about this, I can only speak for myself (and totally realise those of you who may not have children will feel horrified) however if you have had your family I can truly say I feel completely liberated and am totally loving every second of my life post hysterectomy.

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in my own words book coverNow available on our online store and all other online book store’s. In My Own Words: Women’s Experience of Hysterectomy is full of many other real-life stories from women the world over.

Other people’s stories help women feel less isolated. They show that they aren’t going mad, missing the point or stupid.

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Linda Parkinson-Hardman

Transformational coach and founder of the Hysterectomy Association. Professionally I'm an information scientist who specialises in the adoption and engagement of digital technologies. I am a writer and author of nine books to date, and I've edited a further seven; phew what a lot for a Thursday afternoon :-)

This Post Has One Comment
  1. Dear Debbie,

    So glad that your are doing well after the surgery. I have not scheduled mine. I am pass the decision phase and into more info phase. Like you, I found most of the blog too negative. My biggest fear is the surgery will mess up my sex drive or sex experience. I am 48 and have plan to continue m sexual activities for awhile. I know that the doctor said she will keep the ovaries and cervix. I could not wait to take out the fibroids. I don’t want them in my stomach and mess up my order organ. Other hard part is accepting that I could not go mountain biking for awhile. Hopefully I could start biking in 8 weeks or sooner after the surgery

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